Thursday, June 30, 2011

Keep on keeping on...

So I took Trudi's advice, and today I did an anaerobic workout.  I have lost my motivation lately.  I think it is because numbers are not moving the way that I want them to, and I am not seeing the results as quickly as I think I should.  Having said that, today's workout was just what I needed!

Today was something different and challenging!  I did upper body super-sets and abs.  Two pretty great things about super-sets: 1. It keeps your heart rate up due to minimal rests.   2. It passes quickly!  What is better than a quick effective workout!?  The only thing about circuits and super sets, they ALWAYS give me the shakes.  I am up for any suggestions how to combat this!  I ate an orange when I finished today....

So, knowing that I am changing things up and heading into a holiday weekend, I have decided NOT to get too excited about journaling my food intake until the 4th is over.  I DO NOT plan to go overboard...however, I am going to enjoy the good food, family, & friends! 

Yesterday's workout has me, literally, screeching every time I stand or sit.  LOVE IT!  I wonder how I will fare tomorrow during Masters?  It could get ugly! Especially since I did the upper body circuit today!

I have made up my mind to NOT get discouraged with my progress and to push forward.  Having a new game plan will help me move in the right direction.  Encouragement is a MUST when enthusiasm and "want to" are simply lacking!  I do, however, still have my eyes on the prize!  70 lbs to go!  WISH ME LUCK!

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Nothing like a visit with an old friend!

Today I did my workout in a very different, yet familiar place.  I went to see my friend, Trudi.  She owns the gym that I first fell in love with working out in.  She was my first workout partner, and she taught me everything I know about nutrition and exercise.  I KNEW that if anyone would know about these headaches and why I can't seem to drop more weight, she would know!

The first thing was she wanted to give me some good exercises and things to do to mix up my routine.  We did a little leg workout together, and HOLY COW!  I feel it already!  Walking runner lunges, side squats, dead lifts, leg raises side and back, several different angled squats, and standing lunges....  We did them in super-sets, we did them alone.  It felt amazing to hurt again!

I know that sounds crazy, but (and I think most athletes would agree) I love that feeling you get when you walk across the floor with jelly legs!  It means I did something pretty great with my body!  There is nothing like getting past the mental block in your head, and accomplishing a tough set! 

So we decided several things.  We are going to look into my diet first.  I am going to journal everything I eat for the next two weeks and give it to her.  I will discuss our other thoughts if we have to explore them!  In the mean time, I am taking a new look at food and my diet.  Phase 1 of my diet I was cutting portions and exercising.  Simple enough!  Phase 2, I am fueling my body.  I am going to eat to live not live to eat! 

Thank you God for such great friends and connections!

Monday, June 27, 2011

Dear Self,

Dear Self,

Do not let another full week go by without doing pool training!  Do not eat poorly while you are on active rest.  Do not give up during practice, and do NOT quit swimming!!!

Tonight was a tough practice.  The Nazi did my favorite, sprints!  BLAH!  I'm such a slow person.  I want to compete, and I HATE HATE HATE to lose!  However, I am SO STINKIN' SLOW!  Tonight we did diving sprints.  This is the first time I have done a start of any sort since I was like 16 years old. It was frightening and invigorating all at once!

I survived the workout.  I wasn't sure I was going to.  At one point I wanted to tell her I couldn't continue!  But I put my head down and pushed past the mental block and JUST DID IT!  It felt GOOD!  I was tired, out of breath, and felt completely out of shape!  It also felt good to not give up on myself!  There is nothing like shutting that voice in your head up that always says, "Just quit"  "What is it going to hurt?"  "What is half a workout?  At least you did this much"

I shut that voice up, and I DID IT!  I was the slowest one, at the end, by half of the length of the pool, but I FINISHED!  And that is all that matters!  Looking forward to another great workout in the morning.  For the time being, I am hitting the hay!  Until the next time.....

Thursday, June 23, 2011

God is faithful....I can dig it!

I did not work out today.  I feel a little bit guilty about it, but then I have been on my feet decorating the youth room getting ready for VBXtreme most of the day.  I think that though I did not do a formal workout, I had enough activity going on that I got the recovery I needed in, but I still got some colories burned.  Let's hope anyway!

So tomorrow brings a busy weekend with it!  I'm truly hoping that I am not so pooped I can not workout!  However, it is the good kind of tired!  I love working with the kids at my church!  Can't wait to see God do amazing things :)  He is faithful!  I can dig it!

Now let's hope we have a good turn out and my 76 tiny shells are not all for no reason!!!!!!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

It started out as a crummy day.  I missed Steven's bed time call.  I didn't think I would catch him online this morning.  I weighed and had gained 3 lbs.  I wanted a chicken biscuit from Jack's NOT the protein shake I was concocting!  I was just flat out grumpy!

I have come to the conclusion that I have the best friends in the entire world!  They always encourage me when I'm down, and push me to keep going towards my goals!  This morning was no exception.  I whined, and they came to my rescue! 

I did the 3 mile work out and 15 minutes of Pilates this morning.  I am so stinking sore!  I'm not sure if I am letting my body recover enough or not.  My protein drink was actually pretty dynamite!  With frozen fruit mixed in, it was more like a fruit smoothie than a drink to torture me, reminding me I can not have greasy chicken biscuits.

After working out and straightening a little, I got the kid ready and we went to the store.  I bought all the ingredients (which, btw, are really easy to find in a regular grocery store.)  We came home and started on the soup.  Just so you know, if you are not quick with a knife and an accomplished chef, this recipe takes LOTS of prep time!  It's still simmering away in the pot, waiting for me to delve into it yumminess! 

I did the calculations....and they are ROUGH, but one serving is around 200 calories!  Not bad!  The recipe is below.  Check it out for your family....or got to Chili's and order it!  You will NOT be disappointed...  Ok, well you may bc I haven't tasted the home made version yet, BUT if it tastes like it smells....WOW!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

So I did my 3 mile workout this morning.  Why do I STILL want to quit half of the way through EVERY workout!  Swimming, I could swim for hours, but other workouts, I just want to stop!  I love working out too.  So weird. 

Anyway, definitely sore from last night's workout, but in the best possible way!  I have eaten much better today, too.  Always a plus.  Not much to write.  I'm so tired I can barely even think tonight!  So looking forward to working out with Shelle Belle in the morning, and then another good swim tomorrow evening :)  CAN'T WAIT!

Monday, June 20, 2011

"Good job, Terri!"

Yes, you read that right!  I got a good job, tonight.  What's even better is I got a "You have a very pretty breaststroke."  *sigh*  Yes, thank you thank!  THAT was what I need to hear to keep my momentum up!  Who knows, I might be competing in a month if I stick with it!  How awesome would that be?!

OK, so before I dive any further into my workout.  I must discuss my junk food hangover!  I don't know how many of you have ever had one of these hangovers, but it is not fun AT ALL.  It is mostly remorse!  I know I need to lose weight!  I have such great encouragement!  I messed up and ate popcorn and reese's pieces, among other things.  The scale never lies, and buddy did it tell on me this morning!

As a result, I decided to refocus, recenter, and be ready!  So I start out great with my eating.  Then I notice the Nutella jar in the cabinet.  Having never tasted it, I decide, what can it hurt to have a little taste.  I opened an amazingly yummy can of worms!  I have decided that it is of the Devil, sent here to ambush my weight loss dreams!  I have a jar up for grabs!  Come take it!  That's all I have to say about that because now my mouth is watering, and I want a nibble!

So I went to practice this evening, and I am thinking that I might be ready for a meet sooner than I thought :)  Go me!  It may be a 50 yard sprint, but who cares, really?  All that matters is that I kicked serious butt in practice tonight!  AND I got a Good job!  I think I will have sweet sweet dreams about kicking some swim butt.  Watch out guys!  Terri is on the road to Masters Swimming! 

I end this with a phrase I never thought I would be able to say again :)  I am officially a swimmer again!  *sigh*  It feels good!

Friday, June 17, 2011

I'M the biggest loser!

Since I don't know if we are actually having a swim practice tonight due to weather, I decided to go ahead and try the Biggest Loser workout on my Wii.  Uh...yeah!  I hope, if we do practice, I do not have to do anything too strenuous because that was killer!!!!!!

First off, let me just point out that I am proud I even got the Wii set up!  This is usually Steven's job as setting up electronics is "Man Work".  Also, I am afraid of messing something up!  However, seeing as my sweet husband is THOUSANDS of miles away right now, I had to suck it up and do it.  Nothing caught on fire, short circuited, or blew up.  The Wii works.  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

So I put in the workout fully expecting to just have fun.  I was dripping sweat, yes DRIPPING, by the time I was finished.  My legs were shaking, my arms were shaking, and I JUST KNEW I was going to pass out!  Thank God for watermelon.  A good sugary snack post workout!  Love this stuff!!!!!  Needless to say, no wonder these people lose so much weight on that show AND no wonder the trainers have to be so mean!  It is tough!

I do want to log in some extra gym time.  We may go tonight just so I can get some extra cardio in.  Who knows?  Today's life lesson:  "Games" are not always fun!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

How many times do you get a second chance at a dream?

Tonight I have been thinking about where I am, and how far I have come.  You know, in December I checked my blood pressure, and it was 146/99.  I checked it a week ago, and it has dropped to 122/79!  I still can put pictures side by side and not see a bit of difference.  However, as I was out and about today, I almost lost my shorts a few times.  I bent over at the gas station, and thank God I had on a swim suit!  They fell to my ankles!!!

There are things in life that we want so bad.  I want to be in shape.  The way I in-vision myself in my head, and the person I see in the mirror are not even close to the same!  I swam competitively for 9 years of my life.  I can't tell you now why I even quit!  I WILL tell you that I had the chance to go out for the school's team in high school, and I was too afraid.  I have kicked myself a million times for not doing it.  I have said at least 100,000,000 times that if I ever got the chance to swim again, I would JUMP on it.  I WANT to swim!

So many people say that I inspire them to work harder or get moving.  That's humbling for me.  Seriously, I am simply jumping on the second chance God threw my way.  If I was to think about it, it would be a SIN to not take advantage of the opportunities before me.  God has handed me these things on a silver platter, and I am gracefully accepting them with my whole heart!

Thank you, God, for second chances!!!!!  May my child learn to dream big and follow his heart!

P.S. I did a 1 1/2 mile walk tonight.  Nothing big.  Had to work out the kinks from the weeks tough work out.  back to the swimming nazi tomorrow!

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

No, I didn't drown.....But I almost did!

The good news?  I did not drown.  The bad news?  I almost did.  That MIGHT be an over exaggeration, possibly....

In all seriousness, I feel much better about the way I swam tonight.  I felt more fluid and coordinated.  That doesn't mean much coming from me as coordinated is never a word someone would use to describe me.  (Ask my Fall Ball buddies from last season!)  But I felt good about how I performed in practice today. 

I don't recall the last time my arms felt as sore as they do right now.  I don't recall the last time I was so tired from just hard work.  I will tell you, though, that I love every ache and pain.  It is like a tiny notch in my belt moving me that much closer to my goals!

So about drowning, we had a TOUGH workout today!  In the 2nd to last set, we had to do 400 free, with ascending 100's....which means every 100 is faster than the one before.  The last hundred you are sprinting.  (Have I mentioned that the last time I did this I was 16?  Just wanted to point that out again!)  OK, so I am in it!  Pushing, muscles screaming, legs burning, but I am SWIMMING and it felt good!  Then I hit the wall.

If you run marathons, you know ALL ABOUT THE WALL.  I hit it.  SMACK!  I could not breath.  Now this isn't like running where you can slow down, and walk.  NO I had to STOP!  Ms. Nazi, I mean Denise, comes over and is like, "You ok?!"  "Yeah, just lost my breath."  "How ya feel?"  (with that deceptively sweet voice and face) "Well, I'm not going to throw up, if that's what you mean."  "Good!  Gimme that last 50!!!  Go!"  So, I DIDN'T drown, but I thought I might! 

Today has been a good confidence builder for me for many reasons.  1. I'm down 3 more of the 7 lbs I gained while Steven was home on R&R.  WOOOH!!!!! (only 2 more to where I was when he got here!)  2. We did a lot of kicking tonight.  Kicking is my strong point!  3. I was NOT the slowest person tonight!!!!  YEA!!!!!

Now a fun day of swimming with my good friend, Christa, tomorrow.  I'm thinking I might get INSANE tomorrow morning, with some cardio recovery though ;)  And back at the grind Friday, for another night of torture with the swimming Nazi.  I feel genuinely happy for the first time in MONTHS!  Thank you, God, for blessing me with a second chance to pursue something I love so much!

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Back in the Saddle Again!

I had such a disappointing night last night!  After my swim, I felt like such a failure.  Hopefully, you will come to know me better through this blog.  However, those who know me well know I hate when things don't come easily to me or I don't do as well as I feel I should. 

For example, a few years ago I went to Colorado (my second happiest place on earth!) with my youth group.  EVERYONE was snowboarding, and I was in decent shape at this point in my life.  I tried it.  What a baby I became when I couldn't stay on my feet for more than 15 seconds on that stupid board!  I literally cried and screamed!  Such a poor showing on my part.  I'm slightly embarrassed by it NOW.  At the time, I could not for the life of me figure out why my body would not do what my mind was telling it to!  Two painfully slow, grueling hours later, I made it down the bunny slope...the first time.  Yes, 2 hours for my first run down.  Please understand that most of this time was spend on my rear!  The next day I chose skis and didn't fall...not even once!  One must redeem one's self when one let's one's self down!

This morning I woke with aching muscles and a bruised pride, not unlike the enormous bruises I went home with that day on the bunny slope!  I had a quiet time of reflection while Alex was still sleeping.  In that time I decided I must do something extremely tough and familiar to bring the confidence back up!  So I pulled out the old Leslie videos and did a hard core 30 minute weight loss walk.  Then I did what I do best, weights! 

(Terri's 2 cents:  I don't understand women who refuse to do weight training.  Women are not built genetically to be bulky!  By building muscle we increase our metabolism and strength!  Muscle gives us endurance and strong hearts.  A workout of simple cardio is an imbalanced workout!)

So I worked my core, bi's, tri's, chest, shoulders and back.  These are workouts I can make my body do with ease!  I felt strong and confident lifting and pushing!  I think I am back in the saddle and ready to be tortured by the Swimming Nazi again tomorrow night!  Today's lesson: If at first you don't succeed, do something you know you can, and try the other thing again later!  Now for a hot shower and some muscle cream...I'm so sore!!!!!!

Monday, June 13, 2011

NEVER, ever, ever, ever give up!

OK, so I have a tiny confession to make.  Friday, I MIGHT have been the only person without a life to show up to Masters Swim Practice.  *hanging head in shame*  It took GUTS to get there!  It took guts to swim for the coach in front of all the people splashing about recreationally.  It DID take guts.  TONIGHT?  It took nothing but sheer determination.  With four other swimmers, leaving me in a sea of bubbles....nothing but determination!

I truly wanted to give up tonight.   I never really want to give up.  Tonight, I wanted to throw in the towel and call it quits.  I tell ya, it was not because it was a tough workout, or because it hurt.  It was because it took me TWICE as long to complete the sets as everyone else.  TWICE AS LONG PEOPLE!  At one point, I literally ate my lane buddy's bubbles.  I thought I was going to drown!

I reached deep deep deep (I had to) down into my gut, and I pulled the full workout out of me somehow.  It was the biggest fight of nerves and determination I have ever had!  How bad do I want to do this?  Am I willing to come week after week and nearly drown in order to reach my goal?  Am I willing to humble myself in front of these guys and humiliate myself week after week.  The answer tonight was, YES!

I can not even see a finish line to my goal to compete.  What I CAN see is that I love this sport!  I love the way it makes me feel.  I love the way my body moves through the water.  I love that this is a sport that,  though I am S-L-O-W, comes very easy to me.  I WILL compete again one day!  I will!  It may take a year or ten, but it IS going to happen!

As for tonight, I am just proud I didn't give up!  I'm proud that I kept swimming even though I was repeatedly lapped.  I'm proud of what little bit I have accomplished no matter how slow I am.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Almost one week down, and I've survived!!!!!

For the first time in a long time, I didn't have trouble waking up this morning.  I didn't sleep great last ngiht, but enough.  My body automatically woke up at 5:15-ish.  What does one do when one wakes up well before they expect?  WORK OUT!  Of course!  But this was the first morning in over a month I didn't want to crawl back under the covers.  I was, actually, anxious to get up and moving!

I expected to be really sore after last night, and I am.  It's the kind of sore that makes you want to do it again, though.  The beginning days of a workout routine are always the hardest for me.  Some people need a buddy to hold them accountable and keep them on track.  I just need motivation.  I have to WANT to do something.  It doesn't matter if I had to answer to 100 people, if I don't want to work out, I won't!  So, it felt really good to have motivated myself to get up and get through my 3 mile workout.

Something I pondered this morning was eating.  We eat for pleasure.  We love the tastes and textures of different foods.  I, however, want to change my mindset towards food.  I want to feed my body what it needs, not just what I desire.  I have set a pretty lofty goal for myself, that I intend to follow through with.  if I continue to eat for pleasure, I'm not sure I can reach it.

So, all my foodies out there!  This is my plea!  Give me some sites to look up and ways to research eating for LIFE.  It has to be food I will enjoy, too though.  If I don't like the texture or taste, I'm going to go for a cheeseburger instead, jus sayin'!  

The first steps of the next phase of my journey to a healthier me have been much harder than you can dream.  Everyday I have to talk myself into doing what I know I must do to get where I want to be.  The key to my motivation?  I WANT it, and I want it BAD! 

Thank you for the continued encouragement.  This week has felt wonderful!  It hurts!  But it feels so good to be moving.  Now if only my body could match the way I feel inside!

Friday, June 10, 2011

Fear is the parent of cruelty. - James A. Froude

I thought I would throw up. Not during the workout, before I even left the house!  I was terrified.  I have not done an official, formal practice of anything since I was 16 years old!  For those not in the loop, I'm almost 32!  That's a long time!

I texted my trusty "campers", and pouted and whined.  I texted my oldest, wisest sister and complained.  I posted my nerves on facebook.  The sky was cloudy, God is this a sign!?  Can I get out of it????  (It was sunny by the time I reached the gym) 

Why was I so frightened?  Easy!!!  These are people who actually DO triathlons!  These are adults who ACTUALLY COMPETE!  They are the level I want to be!  I was sweating and shaking because I didn't even know where to go or who to talk to or what to do next.  But I WANT this, and I want it badly!  I'm never going to get to THAT level without working for it. 

When I took Alex to childcare, I know the girl thought I must have been on speed because my hands were TREMBLING.  People, we are talking REAL FEAR here!  I have not been this afraid since, well I can't think of a time I was that nervous!  So, I went to the locker room to "suit up", and I sat on the bench.  I prayed, "God," I said. "Please....PLEASE don't make me look like an idiot!  PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!" 

I walked, timidly, out to the pool and asked one of the 12 year old (OK they are probably at least 16) lifeguards where to go for Masters.  I could see in his zit covered face that he was thinking, "BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"  However, he politely pointed me in the right direction by yelling across the pool to ANOTHER 12 year old kid.  At this point all eyes are on McFatty Melvin in the Speedo swim dress.  *sigh*

I marched across the deck, spoke to Denise, and she got me started.  She is a tiny, sweet voiced lady.  I never would have guessed that she was really a Swimming Nazi!  She pushed me harder than I have been pushed in 17 years.  It felt GREAT!  THIS is what I love about this sport!  EVERYTHING!  I love the feel of the water.  I love the way the chlorine smells.  I love how good it feels when you know you have pushed yourself as hard as you can go!

Denise had me doing these upper arm drills.  I felt like I had never swam a day in my life.  She was probably silently doing her sinister, Nazi laugh while I was trying to get my body to do what I was telling it.  Why does no one tell us that when we become adults, our bodies do not work in unison?  Our legs do not cooperate with our arms!  So I ask at the end of the workout, "How was I?  Awful?"  Denise, in her sweet little Nazi voice says, "Your form needs work, but you have great endurance."

I guess for today, that is all I can ask for!  I am patting myself on the back.  Not just because I survived the workout, but because I did it!  I stepped out of my comfort zone, and I did it.  For tonight that is enough for me.  Now to take my sore muscles for a nice long soak in a hot bath!  Monday will get here quickly, and I have another workout with that sweet little Nazi!

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Pushing on...

OK, this has nothing to do with fitness, but I must say that I appreciate and admire single moms more and more with every passing day of this deployment!  The weight that my little boy carries on his shoulders seems so unfair sometimes.  The weight I carry being the sole responsible party for him seems unbearable!  My only hope is that when all is said and done, he is scarred minimally and appreciates the sacrifices his mom and dad make to give him a good life.  That's all any parent could want, really....

Having said that, what is a better way to rid yourself of stress than exercise!?  So, I really just wanted to stay at home and do nothing today.  Most of the day that's just what I did.  Felt tired and sore and sorry for myself.  But as my mood rapidly worsened this evening, I decided something had to be done.  So I met my good friend Roxanne, and we hit the track. 

Why I feel like I have hit a brick wall this week is completely baffling!  It seems like I am starting to work out all over again from day one!  I'm hurting, tired, and S-L-O-W!  I would understand if I had done nothing while Steven was home, but we exercised while he was here.  All I know is I need to snap out of it!

I am EXTREMELY nervous about starting masters tomorrow!  It will be an excellent workout, but ugh!  It's something I have always wanted, so what can it hurt to just try it?  Wish me luck! 

"Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change." - Jim Rohn

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Breathing...I think....

I started the morning out running late.  I hate days like that!  I was determined to swim today!  So I call the "Y" and ask (for like the 50th time) when lap swimming is.  I draw up the courage to go (because it is one thing to swim when no one is there to watch and the ones that are are generally...well...geriatric, shall we say).  We piled into the truck, and again I talked myself out of working out like 300 times before I actually got there. 

As I walked past the pool to enter the gym, I see SO MANY people sitting around and splashing about.  Not just that but young, beautiful life 12 of them!  I wanted to take my very large, old butt back to the truck and drive home so bad!  But fear of what others think is ANOTHER reason I ended up 125+ lbs overweight!

So what did I do?  I took a deep, shaky breath and marched into the gym.  I swiped my card, I took Alex to childcare, and then....I panicked!  What are these KIDS going to think of my big butt swimming?  Doing the walk of shame across the deck to the lap pool, I had to keep reminding myself to breath.  Trying to do my best to look like I do this all the time, which I do, I trip over my towel and nearly take out 2 lounge chairs!  UGH!  This was not how I wanted to start out!

So I swam my 2000 yards.  I pushed it pretty hard today too.  Some days the water feels smooth and easy.  Some days it is like all you do is fight the water, and that today.  After 100 yards, I thought I wouldn't be able to finish.  I pressed on and when I was done I looked at my watch, only 45 minutes had passed!  How exciting!!!  The first day I swam it took over an hour to do 1500 yards!  Progress is good! 

I, also ran into my new friend Christina today.  She's a lifeguard, and new Masters swimmer.  Guess what yours truly will be starting Friday night!  Masters swim program.  Yes, I am going to bite the bullet and try it!  So wish me luck.  I am off to a good start I think!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

The journey of 75 lbs begins with one step

Granted, realistically, I am saying 70 lbs is the goal for 7 months.  Totally doable!  However, it would be nice to lose the extra 5! 

I had NO motivation!  I talked myself out of the workout like 50 times just on the ride from my house to the gym!  (Just ask my mom.  I even told her right before we pulled into the parking lot that I was just going to start tomorrow.)  But starting tomorrow is what got me 125+ lbs overweight.  I want to make a difference in my life TODAY!

So what did I do for my workout today...?  SURVIVE!  Elliptical on incline 10 with 8 resistance for 30 minutes and a 5 minute cool down.  Then a weight session of back, bis, and Tris.  Yes, it was simple.  Yes, I have done more in one day, but I upped my weight a little and increased the intensity of my cardio.  (Higher RPMs and more resistance.)  I thought I would die.

I was reminded in the end how much I love the rubber arm and leg feeling, and how I love knowing I accomplished something great!  An ironman finisher once sent me a picture that said, "Good things come to those who wait.  Great things come to those who are willing to work for them."  I want great things!  I'm EXPECTING great things!  Let's see what happens, shall we?